Hey all, (and Crazyfck)

I was browsing google website Crazyfck's other stories section when I came across his story, (written in Portuguese) called Ohlos Ventras about a woman who has problems with her religious problems with her family.

I changed the family dynamics a bit, I made the main female character a long time house servant (instead of a parent) and made the other characters grown up nephews to their rich uncle who are visiting their uncle for a family reunion.

The story generally follows Crazyfck's story, but, as you can see, I added some more elements throughout. Do you think it would be okay if I uploaded to it Brawna as long as I recoginized that it was inspired by Crazyfck?

Thanks.

Not sure for others, but I'd like to read it 

************ NSFW

At the end of the month, Mr. Esquibel returned from his trip. He looked haggard and tired at dinner that night and he didn’t seem to notice Ms. Quitada in his weariness as he talked about his trip. His  nephews asked him questions as they enjoyed their meal around the table. Poor devil, she thought, he’s such an attractive man. Why doesn’t he notice me now? Thoughts of sex began to race through her mind as she looked at Mr. Esquibel’s solemn face. It’s been so long. Notice me! Notice me! She stopped herself, inwardly chiding herself. I must not think those thoughts! They are impure! As she ran the internal struggle in her mind, she felt the attention of Mr. Esquibel’s nephew James focus on her in between bits of conversation. Her sixth sense turned on and she felt her body tingle. He was staring at her! Why was he staring at her! She looked downward at her food and as she did she could hear a small voice whisper in the back of her mind, identifying the nature of James’ fascination with her. Lust, the voice whispered. Lust? He’s attracted to me? No! and as she thought this she felt a small tingle of energy bringing her to arousal. Lust.. Lust.. LUST the voice whispered. Not able to take any more, she stood up, her plate and glass rattling as she jarred the table.

“Ms. Quitada are you feeling okay?” Mr. Esquibel asked calmly and dispassionately.

“I’m fine sir,” she said uncertainly. “I just remembered that I left the stove on.” James’ eyes fell upon her  small chest. His eyes glazed over and his mouth  was dry. The words LUST… LUST… LUST continued to whisper in in Ms. Quitada’s mind as her arousal grew. “ I must take care of it.” she said, grabbing her plate, sliverware, and glass to take with her. Nervously, she tripped over her chair and her plate fell. She blushed and bent over, not realizing that her heavy skirt was clinging to the increasingly sexy curvature of her butt. As she stood up again, she could feel the eyes of Mr. Esquibel’s other guests focus upon her as she made her way around the room. Their eyes darting vaguely to her hips and butt. NO! I‘m trying to hide my body! she thought  I will not perpetuate sin! From deep inside, her subconscious whispered to her, Let them look upon you. This is what you want. the voice said seductively. You want them to desire you. You NEED it. As it spoke ,  she felt several new tingles of energy lock onto her. As it did more voices whispered the word LUST in her head. It was almost as if the men around the table, with the exception of Mr. Esquibel, had become drawn to her when she focused on her inner desires. It was as if they had heard her inner desires and were obeying. Absurd! she thought. Her subconscious voice spoke to her, almost seductively, Is it?  She looked around the room one last time. Several eyes were still locked to her. She left quickly.

“Where were we?…” Mr. Esquibel said.

***********

One more LITTLE Sneak Peak. (The story is 27 pages long)--- I guess you could say I'm looking for feedback. ***NSFW****

“Hi can I help you?” a young, blonde and athletic, twenty something woman asked. She had beautiful blue eyes, and a firm and toned body which screamed I can get anyone I want, losers need not apply!  The young woman paused when she looked at Ms. Quintada’s baggy and bland clothing and sneered slightly. Her eyes possessed a contempt for Ms. Quintada which said, Look at this old broad! You have got be kidding me!

Ms. Quintada smiled. “Why yes, I’d like to buy something new.”

The young woman looked at Ms. Quintada appraisingly and said, “Follow Me.” The young woman then made her way over to a rack of clothes designed for slightly older people.

Ms. Quintada laughed gently. “Uh, I was thinking that maybe I could try something on more like that,” she said pointing at the more sexy wares, “Yes. Definitely that.”

The woman snickered outwardly. “Sure. Okay. Whatever. The dressing rooms are in the back. Try on whatever you’d like.”

“Thanks, but these will be all that I’ll require,” she said picking up a black, body hugging, mid thigh length skirt, black stalking, a long sleeved, button up, black blouse, and a pair of black pumps. “Be back in a few.” she said as she turned her back on the young woman.

Standing in the room, she took off her heavy garments and slowly put the new ones on. Rolling the black pantyhose up her thigh, she marveled at how nicely the darker hose shaded her skin. Extending her leg out, she slowly rotated her leg and loved how the darker tones gave her muscular thighs the appearance of higher peaks and deeper valleys. Standing up, she slipped her feet into the black pumps and her calves flexed seductively. Taken all together, the combination of the mid-thigh length skirt, black blouse, and pumps gave her the sexiest pair of legs within a hundred miles of Rio De Janiero, a city known for beautiful Brazilian women. Breaking a small piece of wood off the wooden hanger, she collected her luxurious black hair on top of her head in a sexy bun. While her face was still in the process of reaping God’s rewards she thought, hair thick black rimmed glasses gave, added a touch that said sexy librarian. She puckered her lips in the mirror.

 I LIKE this, she thought and then sighed. Alas, I have a duty to God, she frowned. Screw it!, her mind said, Live a little. You can have both. Embrace it. Let yourself be desired, loved, and beautiful. She moaned at the thought. It was then at that moment that she decided that she no longer cared. Even though at times she felt guilty for her potential to cause others to sin, she was becoming indifferent. After all, she wasn‘t the one sinning, she reasoned, they were. She had always longed to be adored, had always longed to be beautiful. So what if a sexy body fed sin? Sin could be dealt with through prayer. After all, she thought greedily, their prayers brought them closer to God. God rewards her with this changing body, this sexiness, this STRENGTH that had she prayed for. And I LIKE it, she thought deviously.

That strength was on display now. She knew she was different. She was evolving. Changing, and with that change and evolution, Ms. Quintada decided to use her first name. Esmeralda, named for the glowing emerald eyes she possessed, the eyes which her parents named her for. With her recent changes, they were more radiant than ever. She felt reborn.

She stepped out of the dressing room and called out to the young woman. “Ms! Ms! I need these items in some larger.. um… sizes.”