[Evan Stanley]

WARNING! I am about to tell you totally factual and real events about myself!

I actually found this to be a tricky subject, and here are my experiences.

I was with a girl once I hid it from. For about 8 months. She eventually heard the terms "BE" and "FMG" and wanted to know what they were. She humorously poked me about it, and I caved in. She thought it was very interesting, almost fascinating. She actually started to take up weightlifting as a way to indulge and humor me.

But as time went on, she felt more and more inadequate. Like she'd never be enough for me. It hurt her feelings, and she cried over it at night sometimes. I felt very guilty. We broke up. It wasn't the reason we broke up, or even the top three… but it didn't help and I hurt her.

A wise person once told me later "Don't try to morph someone into that. Find someone that was already into it." I took that advice to heart. And I didn't date again. I wasn't exactly a gym frequenter. And I ruined my first real love. This was in 2001. It destroyed me. I would have feelings again for a girl for almost four years.

Then in 2005 I came home one night after work. I worked a swing shift, and was getting home around 10 or 11PM. We had a scheduled Werewolf: The Apocalypse session that night with me and my friends. They were already at the table in the bedroom were we grouped up to game. My friend Sean had brought his dorm-mate Tracy along that night (UNLV was across the street) out of boredom. I remember the first time I saw her. Something about her stuck with me. She came to the next three games. I walked her home twice. Then a few weeks later we were roleplaying. She had made a new Dungeons and Dragons character. She had never played before, so we all suggested Fighter. Cause any idiot can play a Fighter. She agreed, and rolled her stats. Her Strength wound up being 18/00. For those of you lacking the greek cred… that is the highest Strength you can possible start a game with. It means she rolled three 6 sided dice and got an 18, and then rolled a 1d100 and got a 100. Yes, the odds alone were staggering. So Arianna was born, the musclebound princess of a kingdom. I was playing a frost mage, an elven boy that was beyond hot for her. How could he not be? I was, and she was FICTONAL!

That night, everyone fell asleep while roleplaying. Eventually, the two of us were sitting close together. We wound up touching each other, even kissing while still acting in character. I finally broke character and whispered, foreheads touching to her and said "Does this feel real to you?". She said "Yes" breathlessly.

It began. I walked her home, and walked away from her dorm dancing to Shawn Michaels "Sexy Boy" them on my walkman. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YcDAthRAJo . After four years of hurt, I had feelings for someone. And I had the balls to accept it. The very next night, I was locked out of my apartment by my roomates on accident. I went across the street at almost midnight and went to see her. We wound up in the lobby of her floor. It was a long, emotional night for both of us. I broke down and cried. She cried. I told myself if I was going out, I was going out in a blaze of glory. I told her EVERYTHING. I told her my dream was to be wed to a big, strong Amazon that would me and take care of me forever. She held me and accepted it all. 100%. She wasn't turned off at all. It became her mission in life from that day forward to be everything I wanted her to be.

Its now 2008. We were married last November. She has a diary now where she records her bodybuilding measurements. She works out religiously. We have a little girl now, going on 2 years old we named Aurora.

We still have Aerik and Arianna, the alter egos that we braved to each other. Representations of ourselves that mirror our real life lives. We played them less as time went on, as our real life love felt more real, something we could feel and touch. I fall asleep at night now, lying on her breasts, caressing her biceps as she flexes them. She kisses me on the head before I doze. I've never slept comfortably anywhere but a couch before now.

I was honest and forthright with her from that night we wept in her college lobby. It was a major turning point for both us. Everything I've told you is 100% true, down to the last detail.. even if someone of it sounds like something you'd only read in a story. I cherish everytime we make love, talking about her growing bigger and how it turns her on. As a type this, we just made love for an hour… and I feel just as blessed under my powerful wife now as I did the night she swore to my mine forever.

Dreams can come true,
-Evan Snow-Wolf

[TC2]

I really liked that story of yours, it's very believable and I can see it happening.

There is however, one thing that I failed to mention earlier which was actually very important.  It's simply this:

"Though different people will experience the same problems, there is no one solution to solve them all."

This is the equivalent of a book explaining to you how to win back your ex.  A book describes how you can win this girl back, but what happens if the reason she broke up with you in the first place was because you tried to murder her with an axe?  I highly doubt that books advice will be able to win her back.

Same rule applies here, yes honesty is the best policy but it doesn't work for everyone.  Everyone has their own style on how they approach problems, some people may start to stutter badly as they confess their fantasies while others may make their fantasy sound worse than it really is.

Some people will have a better shot writing to their love, showing their love a picture, or just have it conveniently pop up at the right time.

What Evan describes, and don't take offense to this buddy.  But to me that's more of a passive role, to be snuggled in the bulging arms of an amazon and the like.  Something like that wouldn't suit me, I'm not looking for someone to be my protection or anything like that.  I love muscular women, I admire and adore them, but that's not a position that I personally would want to see myself in, doesn't suit my personality.

So the way Evan managed to get his muscular beauty, would just simply not work for me.

The approach suggested earlier of just blurting it out on the first date, that doesn't work for me either.  I don't like people knowing about -my- secrets, especially if I'm not going to know them very well.  Sorry, but I don't like strangers knowing a secret that I've kept hidden for decades.

Also, Lupus Bazaar…

I'm sorry dude but you're in denial if you think you can keep that secret hidden for the rest of your life.  You know you could end up getting yourself into a serious depression keeping things like that from your love?  Fortune favors the brave my friend, your secret is GOING to come out.  The only way to prevent it is to stop liking muscular women, but it's going to come out and you can either choose to get severely embarrassed when it spills, or be a man and just reveal it yourself.

Sorry, my bravado is starting to contaminate this response; but it's something I feel very passionate about and I just wanted to let it out and make sure people are aware that there is no ONE solution that will solve all the problems in this particular case.  The only assured best approach is to let that secret out under your terms, because the alternative could really humiliate you down the line.

[Evan Stanley]

What Evan describes, and don't take offense to this buddy…

None taken. People on this forum are really the last people to get offended at the notion of having different tastes, amirite?

[TC2]

You are correct sir.

[LupusBazaar]

Don't worry collector I don't think I have the attention span to be depressed.
Of course I could be in denial, but I doubt it.
Wait.. was that denial of denial?
Nah! ^_^

[Fett]

WARNING! I am about to tell you totally factual and real events about myself!

I actually found this to be a tricky subject, and here are my experiences.

I was with a girl once I hid it from. For about 8 months. She eventually heard the terms "BE" and "FMG" and wanted to know what they were. She humorously poked me about it, and I caved in. She thought it was very interesting, almost fascinating. She actually started to take up weightlifting as a way to indulge and humor me.

But as time went on, she felt more and more inadequate. Like she'd never be enough for me. It hurt her feelings, and she cried over it at night sometimes. I felt very guilty. We broke up. It wasn't the reason we broke up, or even the top three… but it didn't help and I hurt her.

A wise person once told me later "Don't try to morph someone into that. Find someone that was already into it." I took that advice to heart. And I didn't date again. I wasn't exactly a gym frequenter. And I ruined my first real love. This was in 2001. It destroyed me. I would have feelings again for a girl for almost four years.

Then in 2005 I came home one night after work. I worked a swing shift, and was getting home around 10 or 11PM. We had a scheduled Werewolf: The Apocalypse session that night with me and my friends. They were already at the table in the bedroom were we grouped up to game. My friend Sean had brought his dorm-mate Tracy along that night (UNLV was across the street) out of boredom. I remember the first time I saw her. Something about her stuck with me. She came to the next three games. I walked her home twice. Then a few weeks later we were roleplaying. She had made a new Dungeons and Dragons character. She had never played before, so we all suggested Fighter. Cause any idiot can play a Fighter. She agreed, and rolled her stats. Her Strength wound up being 18/00. For those of you lacking the greek cred… that is the highest Strength you can possible start a game with. It means she rolled three 6 sided dice and got an 18, and then rolled a 1d100 and got a 100. Yes, the odds alone were staggering. So Arianna was born, the musclebound princess of a kingdom. I was playing a frost mage, an elven boy that was beyond hot for her. How could he not be? I was, and she was FICTONAL!

That night, everyone fell asleep while roleplaying. Eventually, the two of us were sitting close together. We wound up touching each other, even kissing while still acting in character. I finally broke character and whispered, foreheads touching to her and said "Does this feel real to you?". She said "Yes" breathlessly.

It began. I walked her home, and walked away from her dorm dancing to Shawn Michaels "Sexy Boy" them on my walkman. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YcDAthRAJo . After four years of hurt, I had feelings for someone. And I had the balls to accept it. The very next night, I was locked out of my apartment by my roomates on accident. I went across the street at almost midnight and went to see her. We wound up in the lobby of her floor. It was a long, emotional night for both of us. I broke down and cried. She cried. I told myself if I was going out, I was going out in a blaze of glory. I told her EVERYTHING. I told her my dream was to be wed to a big, strong Amazon that would me and take care of me forever. She held me and accepted it all. 100%. She wasn't turned off at all. It became her mission in life from that day forward to be everything I wanted her to be.

Its now 2008. We were married last November. She has a diary now where she records her bodybuilding measurements. She works out religiously. We have a little girl now, going on 2 years old we named Aurora.

We still have Aerik and Arianna, the alter egos that we braved to each other. Representations of ourselves that mirror our real life lives. We played them less as time went on, as our real life love felt more real, something we could feel and touch. I fall asleep at night now, lying on her breasts, caressing her biceps as she flexes them. She kisses me on the head before I doze. I've never slept comfortably anywhere but a couch before now.

I was honest and forthright with her from that night we wept in her college lobby. It was a major turning point for both us. Everything I've told you is 100% true, down to the last detail.. even if someone of it sounds like something you'd only read in a story. I cherish everytime we make love, talking about her growing bigger and how it turns her on. As a type this, we just made love for an hour… and I feel just as blessed under my powerful wife now as I did the night she swore to my mine forever.

Dreams can come true,
-Evan Snow-Wolf

Gay.

[cpbell0033944]

Gay.

Sorry Fett, the guy poured out his heart to us there and I think that you should have given your usually great sense of off-the-wall humour a rest there.  Sorry, but I think that a more serious response would have been better.  No offence intended, just my opinion.

[Fett]

I dunno – last time evansnowwolf posted about his relationship, I jokingly pointed out how unfair it was to talk about his girlfriend to a bunch of sex-deprived schmoes. He found it funny, so I assumed this would be an amusing continuation of our previous chat; mainly because he's talking about a very happy heterosexual relationship he's having and I'm calling him 'gay'. I thought it was funny and light-hearted. ???

[cpbell0033944]

I dunno – last time evansnowwolf posted about his relationship, I jokingly pointed out how unfair it was to talk about his girlfriend to a bunch of sex-deprived schmoes. He found it funny, so I assumed this would be an amusing continuation of our previous chat; mainly because he's talking about a very happy heterosexual relationship he's having and I'm calling him 'gay'. I thought it was funny and light-hearted. ???

Oh don't get me wrong – it was funny – I've long thought that you're the wittiest poster here.  I also understand your in jokes with him; it's just that he was opening his heart to us and I personally felt that this wasn't the right time for your style of humour.  No offence intended.

[ratlaf]

I dunno – last time evansnowwolf posted about his relationship, I jokingly pointed out how unfair it was to talk about his girlfriend to a bunch of sex-deprived schmoes. He found it funny, so I assumed this would be an amusing continuation of our previous chat; mainly because he's talking about a very happy heterosexual relationship he's having and I'm calling him 'gay'. I thought it was funny and light-hearted. ???

I heard Fett's tone of voice when he said this and it was exactly like Ed from the movie "Shaun of the Dead" when he light-heartedly says the same thing to his best friend Shaun…  Awesome movie by the way!

TC2: You're absolutely right.  There's no one solution because every person is unique and every relationship is unique.

EvanSnowWolf: Thanks for sharing!!!

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