[Matthew Lim]

I had mentioned in the original thread that I didn't know the characters. But now that I've watched a couple episodes of the show and have an understanding of the characters now, I have to say, the story is really great. Maybe the adults can join in on the fun? *drools over the thought of a muscular Kurenai*  😛

[Debido-San]

XD ya know, at first I didn't think Kurenai was all that great…I was like "Wow, baggy robe, seems flat."

then while rewatching some episodes, as I tend to do from time to time, I ran by this picture and had to screen shot it lol…

I wasn't planning one for Kurenai, but I was thinking to myself "There's enough room in this thing for there to be a spinoff for like…every female character…Besides Moegi :P" Maybe if I were unlazy enough, it'd happen, but for now, I'd say no…took me enough just to crank this out…

[lowcast2000]

Great story, your Kinniku no Jutsu stories are in my top 5 favorite fmg stories, haha.  There was just one thing that i would like to comment on, and that is that there is one point in the story where you repeat yourself.

Here….

Her back also had to play catch up, as her small breasts began to balloon as well, almost as if by magic, jiggling to an immense DD cup in moments. Kinniku no Jutsu may have, in name, only been meant to increase one's body size, but it seemed that it also most tended to amplify the genetic endowments that were found attractive in women, big, firm breasts, large, round buns, and more of a curve to the body as a whole, for women, kicking up that delicious hourglass shape with traps forming under the woman's colossal arms, like two gently sloping domes hanging out to her sides, threatening to burst from her skin to form wings.

An then here…

“Oh come on, even Hinata had a pair of these.” She said to herself with a smirk. Sakura playfully, with her tongue peeking out just so from her lips, brought her arms together in front of her, her already hulking body expanding in every direction, as well as pouring some of that power into her breasts, turning them from the small, unassuming AA cups, to large, and growing DD cups, which pulsed with power, but were still as soft and squeeze-easy as natural boobs.

[Debido-San]

lol thanks for the short critique! I'm honestly not sure if I did that on purpose or not though…

I think it works out pretty ok though, I was just pressed for thinking up more description!

[Max]

Certainly that was a slip of mind. One that I didn't want to mention since it was great to see the whole growth again. Kind of a flashback  ;D

Max

[lowcast2000]

lol thanks for the short critique! I'm honestly not sure if I did that on purpose or not though…

I think it works out pretty ok though, I was just pressed for thinking up more description!

Ya it flows fine with the story.  Haha, i've got to agree with max, ha.

[mikazuki]

Sorry for the lateness in joining the bandwagon. But yeah, WELL DONE!! That was an impressive display of will for you to finish Chapter 2 *applauds* And I have to say I've never enjoyed Naruto so much *big thumbs up*

the two newly built brickhouses caught sight of him

This descrip made me chuckle, probably because I've never seen it used before. And how fitting *chuckles again*

And that is an ultra hot picture of Kurenai. Yes, hot. Indeed. Mmm.

[higalack]

Nice story man a definite good solid two chapters so far.

[Debido-San]

hehe, thanks you two, coming from two people I talk to a bit more regularly, it means a lot that you guys actually drop by here and say something lol!

[Cowprobe]

Great story so far Debido-San.

Thank you for sharing this length of work. Your accuracy is only matched by your capacity to add FMG/BE without it seeming alien to the characters' natures.

You keep writing and I'll keep reading.  8)

[Author]

Posts