Celeb Saga I Prt 4 (with TF’s!)

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    Well if anyone's enjoying it, here's the next chapter, if not I can get out of your way guys.  Anyhoo nice job on the new site format 🙂

    Everybody Hulks

    Shakira came down from her room and met Mike who was still seated at the bar having what now seemed to be a heated discussion with Dennis.  She could see he was as smartly dressed as she could hope he’d be.  White shirt, black trousers, polished shoes; she wasn’t expecting anything special from him.  She walked over to them, catching the middle of their conversation.
    ‘Raging Bull is the greatest boxing movie of all time you schmuck. Who can deny the dedicated performance of De Niro?’  Mike argued.
    ‘I still say Rocky was the greatest boxing movie of all time, Mr Rielly.’
    ‘You’re discounting number five I hope…’
    ‘Oh hell yeah’
    ‘Well you make a persuasive argument, especially as three features Mr. T’s best performance, but you see the fight scenes…’
    Shakira realising that this argument could go on all night interrupted.
    ‘Actually I think Ali’s the best boxing movie.’
    There was a long pause as both Mike and Dennis looked at Shakira.  Dennis seemed staggered at the beauty of Shakira in her black dress and curvaceous figure.  Mike too realised that he was looking too long at the low cut on Shakira’s dress and seemed fixated on her ‘small and humbles’.  Mike grabbed Dennis by the collar and brought him down to the bar level.
    ‘Dennis, I like you kid but I think you better fix me another coke with ice before you get too comfortable.’  Dennis reluctantly did so.
    ‘Shaks, you dress divinely but you know nothing about the finer arts of boxing movies.’ Mike continued as Dennis returned with his drink.  Mike drank it down quickly and got up off the stool.
    ‘Ready to go, honey?’ Shakira asked sweetly.
    ‘Ready as I’ll ever be, Dennis I’ll see you later.’
    ‘No problem Mr. Rielly. Would you like another cushion for your car seat for…’ Dennis pointed to his rear end as Shakira held back her laughter.  Mike seemed unamused.
    ‘Yes Sir?’
    ‘Shut Up’

    ‘So let me get this straight, we’re going to a swanky Hollywood party and yet you have no idea who’s throwing it.’  Mike questioned while driving the car.
    ‘Bravo Mr. Wayne.  Look it’s Hollywood, celebrity parties are thrown all the time without anyone having a clue who’s hosting them, it’s part of the celebrity high life.’ Shakira replied.
    ‘I’ve known you for three years and besides you telling me the fact that you’re a She Hulk only yesterday, we’ve never been to any high rise celebrity parties.’
    ‘That’s because I’m stuck with always having to suffer your backstage frat parties.’
    ‘You said you liked dancing to old Beastie Boys songs and playing how’d that llama end up in my bedroom!!’
    Shakira was looking into the panel mirror while carefully attaching her earrings.  She had a look of deep concentration as she put the first one on as she spoke: ‘Mike, I do like those parties but it’s nice to have a bit of sophistication in my life now and then, it’s something I’ve so rarely gotten to do since hooking up with you.’
    ‘There was that time we watched Sense And Sensibility…’
    ‘Yeah which turned into a drinking game and only because it was supposed to be Die Hard.  You fell unconscious five minutes in anyhow because your version prompted to drink a shot when someone said an ‘old timey word’.  Madre De Dios’ she muttered under her breath.
    ‘Well I’m so sorry that you think getting hammered isn’t an idea of a good time, well hopefully you’ll have a nice time tonight…well apart from this whole ‘I know you’re big secret ‘deal…Speedbump.’
    As Mike uttered the words, Shakira was in the midst of putting on her second earring.  Upon going over the speed bump, the earring didn’t go in her ear smoothly and scratched her ear beginning to sting.  She yelped in pain and felt her ear feeling a little bit of blood.  Mike glanced at her ear and could see the scratch was beginning to heal already.  Shakira could feel herself getting hot and began to sweat slightly on the forehead.  Her body was tingling all over and she knew that she was beginning to transform.  She put her palms flat on the dashboard and watched as the skin rippled on her hands.  Her breathing was becoming more ragged and she closed her eyes tight.  She snapped them open to see bright green glowing eyes staring back at her in the panel mirror.  She could feel her feet shifting in her shoes too and she struggled to slip them off.  As her dress felt more constricting she let out a loud ‘UHHHH’ which immediately caught Mike’s attention.  He pulled over on the road in wide eyed surprised as he was once again witnessing his best friend transform into the She Hulk.
    He was also bummed because his favourite part of Huey Lewis’ ‘Power Of Love’ was about to come on and he had every intention of singing along to the power ballad classic.
    ‘Shaks, no no no.  No SheHulka, not now.  SheHulka bad.  SheHulka would mean I’d have to move back the seat and this is a compact.  SheHulka would ruin that lovely dress you’re wearing.  Goddammit stop grunting!!’  Mike spoke in a panicky voice.
    ‘GRRR…Would like to…but….AHHH…pretty hard to stop!!’  Shakira grunted.  She knew as soon as she’d double over in pain, it’d be too late.  Mike began to massage her shoulders which somehow began to calm her down.  It felt good and she felt like she was taking control of her alter ego, her anger subsiding.  Mike leaned closer, sweating from panic and began to gently speak in her ear: ‘C’mon Shaks, you don’t wanna be doing this right now, this’ll cause more bad than good, take it easy babe ok.  C’mon, I love you babe, fight the change.’
    Shakira instantly softened and seemed to be sweating less now.  Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes she stopped twitching and the transformation seemed to stop.  She opened her eyes again and Mike was greeted by the warm brown in her eyes.  She exhaled and looked at Mike who was squirming nervously.
    ‘You love me?’  She said.
    Mike’s eyes grew wide again and he sat back down in the seat staring ahead.  ‘Not love you in the Barry White sense of the word, just in a cool sister type of way. You know?’ he playfully punched her on the arm.
    Shakira looked slightly dejected as she said ‘oh’.  Mike turned to her again: ‘Babe, I really care about you that much is true…everything I do…I do it, no that’s too cliché, but just know that I’ll always be by your side, as a friend, cool?  You ok now?’
    Shakira smiled back at him and touched his arm.  ‘Yeah, I’m really ok.’
    Mike smiled back.  ‘Speed bumps, cause more accidents than prevent them huh?’  He started up the car and turned the radio back up and began to sing along. ‘Well here I go again on my owwwwn…take it Shaks.’
    Shakira sighed and sang along too ‘Going down the only road I’ve ever knowwwn.’

    Twenty minutes later, the couple pulled up at the gates of a large mansion.  It had already grown dark and rain was beginning to fall, a thunderstorm appearing to brew up.  On the front windows there were many lights showing that the party was occurring in more than one room. Just then, a lightning bolt struck and illuminated the household making both Mike and Shakira jump.
    ‘Well it’s got a nice Bates Motel quality to it.  Does it say Hammer on the gates?’
    ‘Well that’s one suspect off the list then.’
    ‘Mike ring the intercom and tell whoever it is that we’re here.’
    Mike reached over and pressed the intercom.  It crackled into life.  A young Spanish voice could be heard. ‘Hello?’
    ‘My god Shakira, it’s Jennifer Lopez’s residence, it’s an evil scheme to wipe out all other Latina superstars.  First you, then Gloria Estefan!!’
    ‘This is Maria, one of the home help, how can I help you?’
    Shakira pushed Mike out of the way and leant over to speak into the intercom. ‘Uhh Hi, this is Shakira, I umm received an invitation to the party today, who’s residence is this?’
    The intercom turned itself off and the gates swung open.  Mike drove up the driveway and parked into a space. ‘Well whoever it is, they’re keeping they’re identity secret.  I can’t believe you, I was about to do my drive thru routine!’  Shakira responded by kicking him in the shin.  They both walked up to the door and rang the doorbell.
    ‘Maybe Lurch will open the door’
    ‘Maybe you need another kick in the shin’
    The door swung open to reveal an elderly gentleman smartly dressed.  He was wearing gold buttons on his jacket on an all black suit.  When he spoke there was a clear English accent to his voice.
    ‘Good Evening Madam, welcome to the party, may I have your invitation?’
    ‘I knew it!  It’s Hugh Grant, he’s the villain!’  As Mike said this, the elderly gentleman turned his attention to Mike and a slight look of surprise came across his face.  The man turned to Shakira and began to stammer slightly.
    ‘M-madam brought a guest?’
    Shakira raised an eyebrow.  ‘Uhhh yeah, the invitation said I could.’
    The man quickly rushed to a phone mounted on the wall and dialled a number holding his hand out to delay the guests.
    ‘Yes, yes I didn’t know she’d bring a guest.  It’s ok?  Are you sure? Ok not a problem.’  He turned to them both. ‘I’m dreadfully sorry, it’s just we weren’t prepared.  Ms. Shakira, if you could possibly wear this badge, our host has insisted all guests wear their appropriate name badges.’  Shakira obliged.
    ‘Hey, where’s my name badge?’
    ‘You don’t get one sir, I hope you’ll get over it.’ The man said sarcastically.
    ‘You’re on my list…Benson.’ Shakira sighed and ushered Mike into the main room.
    ‘You know Shaks we may be on the wrong course here, I mean maybe they ‘know’ about your party lifestyle and not that other thing.’
    ‘I’m hoping you’re right, ohh wow.’
    Shakira was wowing at the sight of the main party room.  On both sides of the room were long tables with buffet food and a bar at one corner of the room.  There seemed to be excited chatter around the room and it appeared that the room was immaculately clean.  It was so large too, she’d never seen a room so large.
    ‘Ok honey, I’m gonna go mingle, you can have a drink but make sure you don’t have too many.’
    ‘Shaks, who do you think you’re talking to?’
    ‘Yes ma’am’

    Mike wandered over to the bar and sat down on a stool.  He ordered a JD and coke and turned round to the person besides him.  To his surprise, it was popular actress Courtney Cox.  He smiled at her and she returned his smile.
    ‘Uhh hi, buy you a drink?’ Mike said.
    ‘The drinks here are free’ she laughed.
    ‘Get you a free drink?’
    ‘Sure thing, glass of white wine.’  Mike motioned to the bartender who rolled his eyes and placed a glass of white wine in front of her.
    ‘So you must be really happy that Friends is over huh?’
    ‘Oh hell yeah, you wouldn’t believe what hard work that show was.  I’m gonna miss it though, all the guys were great to work with.’
    ‘Yeah, yeah.  So where’s David?’
    ‘David’s off shooting a new movie and I’d just be cooped up in the house all day so this party was a welcome surprise.’
    ‘Yeah, about that, you know who’s throwing this shindig?’
    ‘That’s weird I really don’t know, I mean the area is familiar but our host’s identity is just being kept a big secret.’
    ‘Uh-huh…so did you ever slip Lisa or Jennifer the tongue behind scenes?’
    Courtney shocked at the statement poured her glass of wine over Mike’s head and stormed off to another part of the room.  Mike dripping wet turned to the bartender.
    ‘Another JD and coke sir?’ the bartender asked.
    ‘Please, it’s gonna be a long night.’

    Shakira looked around to see if she recognised any of her celebrity pals.  Not recognising anyone she strode over to the buffet table and tapped the female at the table helping herself to canapés.
    ‘Uhhh hi?’ Shakira nervously said.
    The female turned round to reveal herself as Katie Holmes.  She was looking breathtaking in her jeans and short tube top.  Her hair was shining off the room’s lights and she shuffled in her trainers.
    ‘Oh my god, you’re Shakira!!’ Katie perkily said.
    ‘Oh wow, you’re Katie Holmes, I love your movies’ Shakira replied.
    ‘Ohh thanks, I really enjoy your music, in fact I listened to your CD on the way over here.’
    ‘Cool.  Hey what’s with the casual gear?’
    ‘Well the invitation didn’t really specify, I thought I’d be the odd one out but it turns out the room’s pretty half and half on the matter.’  Shakira looked around at this point and did indeed notice that half the room was dressed in casual clothes while the other half wore elaborate dresses.
    ‘Whoever organised this party seems to be a little all over the place.’
    ‘Yeah I know, I was so freaked out when I first got the invitation, it just popped out of nowhere.’
    ‘So you all got invitations?’
    ‘Apparently so, everybody’s in the dark as to what’s happening.’
    ‘Katie…umm, you’re not like a…Madre I don’t know how to say this.’
    ‘Sorry Shakira, what’re you getting at?’
    ‘Nothing.  I was just thinking for a second.’
    ‘Who’s that dreamy guy you came in with?’
    ‘Mike?!?  Ohh, he’s just my friend, actually I’m sure he’d love to meet you later on, he’s a big fan of yours.’
    ‘Well he’s gonna be popular, he’s the only guy here so far.’
    ‘Only guy, what the?’ Shakira looked again around the room and did indeed notice that Mike appeared to be the only guy.
    ‘I’m sure it’s just a coincidence, like they’re boyfriends are shooting films or they’re just single.’
    ‘Yeah but…’ Shakira was about to press further when she was interrupted by that other young pop/film sensation Mandy Moore.  She was glowing in her red party dress and black strappy high heels.  Shakira rolled her eyes.
    ‘Hey Mandy.’ Shakira sighed.
    ‘Hey Shakira, I thought it was you. How’re you doing?’ She asked peppily.
    ‘I’m fine Mandy, good job on the new film, watched it, loved it.’ Shakira lied through her teeth.
    ‘Yeah, I uhh really liked it too’ Katie added.
    ‘That’s soo great, you guys. You’re making me blush.’
    ‘Uhh you know Mandy, Mike’s here, I’m sure you’d like to see him.’
    ‘You know, I think I will say hi.  Me and you can catch up soon, you too Katie.’ Mandy laughed and left them.
    ‘Wow.’ Katie said.
    ‘I know, she can’t seem to get off my shoulder.  I hope I haven’t put Mike in it.’


    The continuation as I exceeded the maximum amount of characters in the previous post….

    Everybody Hulks (Continued)

    Mike motioned to the bartender to give him another drink.  Another JD and coke was placed down in front of him as he turned back to Alicia Silverstone who was still talking…
    ‘So I’m like all, ohmigod, she is not wearing that that dress and Jennifer’s like ‘fraid so.  And another thing, I went to get my pedicure the other day, you know celebrate the fact I got the part in Miss Match, you watch that show right?’
    ‘I…’Mike replied.
    ‘That’s soo great, so I got my pedicure done but like I’m really hungry afterwards so I go for a bite to eat at one of the restaurants,  I dunno what it’s called, chez something, anyway it doesn’t matter.  So my feet are still wet from the nail polish I got, it was such a great colour, it had sparkles and everything and I go in barefooted, just so’s my feet can like dry y’know and they won’t let me in, I pleaded with them but they were like no way so I’m like…’
    At that point Mike was tapped on the shoulder.  Being slightly inebriated he turned the wrong way at first and then turned to see Mandy Moore beaming at him. 
    ‘Oh lord, what have I done to deserve this?’ Mike pleaded to the ceiling. ‘I’m just gonna talk to Mandy now ok Alicia?’ but she kept talking regardless.
    ‘Hey Mike, you watched my new film yet?’ Mandy sweetly asked, flicking her dark brown hair behind her.
    Mike tried to say the right thing but too many drinks as a result of listening to Alicia meant his was in trouble.
    ‘Which one?  Chasing Liberty right?’
    ‘Yeah, what’d you think’
    ‘It was f’ning terrible.  I honestly don’t think I’ve seen a movie worse than that and I’ve watched Pauly Shore films.  I mean it was nauseating drivel, how do you put up with it?’
    Mandy’s face was shocked.  She couldn’t believe it, she’d received good reviews from everyone she talked to.
    ‘Yeah, well you’re wrong. Everyone else loved it.’ Mandy responded.
    ‘They’re lying to their back teeth and what was that other film you were in, A Walk To Remember.  The only memorable walk I had was the one when I left the theatre to go home and as far away as your film as possible.’  As Mike said this he fell off his stool and lay in a position next to Mandy’s feet.
    ‘And another thing you’ve got big feet!’  Mandy was noticeably upset and stormed off trying to contain her tears.
    ‘And you were cuter as a blonde’ He shouted after her.  ‘Alicia, I have to go to the toilet, where is it?’
    ‘Fourth door on the left.’
    Mike got up and dusted himself off, staggering a little.  ‘Randy, have another drink waiting for me when I come back.’
    ‘My name’s Rick’
    ‘Sure it is Randy, ok I’ll be back soon.  Hey Alicia, are you Steven Tyler’s daughter?’
    ‘No that’s Liv Tyler.’
    ‘That’s great, tell me all about it when I get back.’

    Mike eventually found the toilet and closed the door to the cubicle.  It appeared this was the guest toilet and resembled a restaurant toilet only without the funny smells or person handing out towels.  Feeling those canapés creeping back up on him, Mike hunched over the bowl and ‘kissed’ it.  Feeling a lot better he put the seat back down and sat down for a bit to regain his bearings.  At that moment he heard the door slam open and then lock as a female was crying.  Mike pried open the door slightly to see Mandy crying over the sink.  Her mascara had run slightly and her head was buried in her arms.  She looked up and saw her own reflection in the mirror.
    ‘Ohhh man, it’s Mandy, I must’ve really upset her, I acted like such a jerk.  I better apologise to her.’
    Mandy seemed angry with herself. ‘He’s right, nobody likes me, god I’m such a loser.’ She cried to herself.  Just then she too felt a little queasy and decided to wash her face in the sink.
    ‘God, I don’t feel very gooooOOODD’ Mandy screamed as she gripped the edges of the sink.
    ‘Wha..what the hell’s wrong with MEEEE’ Mandy suddenly felt a wave of pain go through her and she began to shake a great deal.  Her hands were feeling numb as she looked them, she saw the edges she was holding were beginning to crack.  She spat in the sink as she felt her body temperature begin to increase.  She began to sweat on her forehead, underneath her arms and on the soles of her feet.
    ‘Ssssss’ Mandy hissed through clenched teeth as the wide eyed Mike looked on in disbelief. ‘Pleeasssse, ssssomeone hellp MEEEE’ Mandy jerked violently and pounded the sink sides with her fists, cracking them.  Sweat was dripping into her eyes which stung them forcing her to close them.  When she opened her eyes she looked back at herself in the mirror to see bright green glowing eyes looking back at her.
    ‘Thissss cAAAn’t be HAAAppening!’ Mandy cried out as she reached out to her reflection whose hair was beginning to show blonde streaks in it.  Her bones felt all mushy and she was in great pain as she doubled over on the bathroom floor.  She laid her hands out in front of her and saw that they were rippling and shifting.  Her head was pounding and Jefferson Airplane’s White Rabbit was revolving around in her head.  The blonde streaks were taking over her brunette hair as she clenched her fists and began pounding the floor in anger.
    ‘GET THAT MUSIC OUT OF MY HEAD!!’ Mandy shouted in a more huskier voice as the bathroom tiles broke under her new found strength.  Mike couldn’t believe it that Mandy appeared to be transforming and that she was looking waay hotter than before.  Plus he couldn’t believe she didn’t like Jefferson Airplane playing on the PA.
    She held her hand out in front of her, watching as her polished red fingernails appeared to be growing in front of her and that her hand was getting bigger and growing a faint green.  Her shoes were beginning to tighten as was her red dress.  She watched as her earrings clattered to the ground due to her shifting ears.  She cradled her arms in her head as she snapped back in pain covering her eyes.  Mike could see that her biceps were definitely enlarging, looking much like SheHulka’s did and watched as her body’s colour turned into a much deeper green.  There were gashes in her dress too which showed green flesh.  Everytime she moved, more and more rips were appearing in her dress.
    ‘GRRRR…Ssssshow, Sssshow THEM ALL!!’ Mandy roared out of her luscious green lips.  She flexed her arms as more material shredded around her more curvaceous body.  Her dress was losing it’s battle as her breasts and rear end swelled to larger but manageable portions in Mike’s mind.  He swallowed hard, realising that maybe Mandy wasn’t a nice Hulk like his friend.  Mandy infuriated with her constricting dress grabbed it with both hands and ripped it away from her body revealing only her barely containing bra and panties.
    ‘If I wasn’t so worried, I’d lend her a hand’ thought Mike as he continued to watch.  Her arms wrapped themselves with steely strength as both her thighs and calves did, a rich jade colour coating them.  The only items of clothes left bar her bra and panties were her strappy shoes that too were losing the fight with her enlarging feet.  Mike could already see that some straps had snapped off.  Mandy instead of kneeling, then sat down on her rounded bottom and stared at her shoes losing battle with her feet.
    ‘FFFFeeeeeettt!!’ She growled now sounding nowhere near Mike’s annoying friend but more like a beast.  Albeit..a sexy beast.
    ‘Sssshooow them Biiig Fffffeeeettt’ she continued as she flexed her toes, shredding more straps as they become more rounded and thicker.  Mike could see the little heart tattoo that’s she’d been showing on all the chat shows had grown as well as her toes.  Impatient, she grabbed her remains of her shoes and ripped them away easily like tissue paper revealing her green swelling feet.  She cooed as she watched her toenails grow.  Mike saw that the sole of her foot was bigger than any foot he’s ever seen and looked so powerful yet soft just like the rest of her skin.  The Mandy Hulk had finished her transformation as she stood up on her new bigger feet.  She looked into the mirror and was pleased at what she saw.  Mike was shocked on the other hand.  There stood the much taller, much stronger, green, long blonde hair flowing Mandy Hulk and her panties had remained.  Mike cursed under his breath.
    ‘Puny Mandy gone.  Now there is only me.’  She laughed sexily and Mike again found himself crossing his legs.  As he did so he made a slight noise against the toilet.  The Mandy Hulk picked up on this noise and walked towards the cubicle.  Gripping the toilet door, she pulled it off its to see the cowering Mike.
    ‘Hey there cutie.’ She purred.
    ‘Oh Shit’ Mike replied.


    Matthew Lim

    Woo hoo Mandy-licious (bad pun I know  😛 )

    Great story, so when can we expect chapter 5?  🙂

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