[NecrochildK]

Well see that's just your misfortune(if you wanna look at it that way :P)

She willingly went out of her way to do this. She altered her physical chemistry for more testosterone. You're naturally the way you are. She decided to toss in way more than she already had.

Heh, I wouldn't say I'm naturally like this. Chemical evils of a different sort left me like this along with a hundred ten extra pounds I didn't have before.

[NecrochildK]

:p Personally, neither am I. I'd say at best I will always have an hourglass figure, just how I'm built. But I have so much testosterone, well, I'm not ugly, I know, but I have been called "sir" on more than one occassion.

[NecrochildK]

Ah, I see. Is that the main reason they're bugging about it?

[NecrochildK]

:p It's things like that that made me decide if I am successful in body building I won't bother with competition. I hate such limiting ideas.

[NecrochildK]

::hugs Kulli:: They don't really know you then, nor do they really wish to understand.

[NecrochildK]

Ah, Louisiana is a most wonderful place.
The most favoured of places within the so-called United States.
Maybe it is favoured because when an exceedingly tall gentleman wearing a thick coat, large brimmed hat and leaning on a cane walks down the daylight streets, he seldom gets a second glance.
Unlike most other places in the World.
Oh, well.
Human Nature cannot be helped I's suppose.

Peace
The Pimp NeonBlack

Curiosity isn't such a bad thing all the time. After all, it is how we learn. If I were to see such on the street, likely I would do a double take and wonder, curious about such an unusual person, what they're like, where they're from, etc. I do have a couple of friends here that are really tall, one of them is your average video gamer and anime fan. The other, has led such a rich life and is very knowledgeable, one of the more interesting people I know, though elusive, he often goes into a hermetic lifestyle where for long periods of time no one knows where he is, though some may spot him at a place of work. Anyways, I ramble on and this isn't my thread 😉 Sorry.

[NecrochildK]

I don't quite understand, why would it be set aside as an oddity?

[NecrochildK]

lol Well, for some it's proof of survival and strength. Heck, one time I met a new friend for a movie and he had some friends with him and we hung out after at a local burger place and afterwards we hung out in the parking lot comparing medical horrors. It's kind of like, well, almost like a kinship, a sharing of pain to know yer not alone in what you've suffered. Comparing scars is like… Well, you get people going "Yeah, well lookit this baby! I got that falling off a truck!" "Yeah, well I had open chest surgery, try sitting around with your ribcage propped open for a couple of hours!" After a while it actually gets amusing. I suppose in a way, it's one way people get over their emotional scars from what they've suffered. By making light of it and knowing they aren't the only one who's hurt so bad.

[NecrochildK]

I've already seen my doctor about it more than once, it was my Dad that ordered the blood work the first time to test it all, but my internist ignored it. It's my gynecologist that took it upon herself to help me get my health back in order personally. She is a good friend of our family and knows what measures my dad was taking to try and help me get better. She visited our family several times when my dad was dying and I trust her with my life. When Dad passed away, I was going to ask her personally to help me. I didn't even have to ask. She told me without me having to say a word, that she would help me recover my health. Where my internist would simply brush me off saying all I needed was exercise, Dr. Jurgelski has actually looked into the problem, looked over what Dad had found, run test to confirm what he suspected and is offering me other alternatives. I had been exercising since September and while I had seen improvements in strength, I'm still just as tired as always. Dr. Jurgelski, also knowing my problems with keeping up with pills, offered a choice of an alternative instead of shoving more pills in my hand that I eventually stop taking. My mom said the other day I should go back to my internist, honestly? I don't trust him enough to even let him know I'm going into body building and seeing a nutritionist. I'll leave my care in the hands of the doctor who actually does something instead of shoving pills down my throat and telling me I'm fine when it's obvious I'm not.

[NecrochildK]

I don't mind questions about my scars or anything like that. Honestly, I have no shame of anything I've been through. That particular one is from the mediport from chemo. They insert it under the skin and feed the tube from it through the muscle and between the ribs and down into the heart through a major artery.
As far as my hormone condition, it is rather severe, especially considering my deep clinical depression at times. I'm what some call slightly autistic, asperger's. I don't quite function the same as most mentally, everything turns inward, so I could never hurt another because of my depression, I have hurt myself in the past, but even that is rare because I know it hurts those around me, something I just can't do. I finally got sick of the doctor and said fook it, I'll take it one day at a time and chucked the pills out the window. Some days are worse than others, and my husband's way of making me laugh isn't always enough, but I've learned by now, no matter how much I whine and moan about what's happened to me in life, I've got to face it myself. I try not to lament, but it happens. A lot more often than I'd like. But, I am making an effort. And while it can't solve the chemical imbalances in my brain that are causing this, I can at least train myself to take a step back from it and recognize it for what it is. Honestly? lol I envy manic depressives. At least they get bouts of mania!
About my form, my husband said the same thing. I'm sturdy, I mean my calves are already pretty solid and 17 inches around, my upper arms not so solid, but the muscle is pushing through, about 15 inches around my arms. I took gymnastics when I was a child, and I still hung onto my balance and a bit of grace learned from that, though I was already good with that even when I started the classes. I unfortunately was forced to drop gymnastics because of occult spina bifida, and as a result, I dropped ballet, jazz and tap as well. My love had been gymnastics, the dance classes were for my mom's pride.
::hugs tight:: And you, don't apologize! You don't sound condescending or patronizing, as I said before, your words are very helpful, even if I've thought over such options before. I honestly tend to run into a lot of brick walls. Most people's frustration with me is any time they offer advice, I tell them it won't work, but it's often because I've already tried it or studied the option and seen where it would lead given all the aspects of my situations. x_x So please, I apologize if I sound argumentative on some things.

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