[y498yates]

Some good ideas.  Many of these i do to keep myself in my current state of fitness.  I also sit on a ball at my desk rather than a chair.  It is great for your core and qualifies as "active sitting."  PS – who has time for television?  And who wants to watch reality tv when reality is so much more fun anyway??

Just so you know, "I work to live" means that life comes before work.  Always.  It is the opposite of "I live to work."  😉

Anyway, I am actually in the middle of exploring an opportunity that might allow me to get out of an office job and open my dive shop.  Something like that would obviously create a complete lifestyle change!

[Anonymous]

I also sit on a ball at my desk rather than a chair.
Holy crap, that’s a GREAT idea!! I wonder if they’ll let me do that here. My supervisor is big on keeping up with appearances.

And who wants to watch reality tv when reality is so much more fun anyway??
Reality TV blows.

Just so you know, "I work to live" means that life comes before work.  Always.  It is the opposite of "I live to work."
Yeah, I know 🙂 

Anyway, I am actually in the middle of exploring an opportunity that might allow me to get out of an office job and open my dive shop.  Something like that would obviously create a complete lifestyle change!
Oh, WOW! Good luck with that!! Remember: location, location, location!! I've seen so many awesome businesses go belly up because of bad location. Pay more money for a better location. Better to take longer to break even than file a Chapter 11 later on.

[averageguy2]

Wow. I knew you'd respond like that. LOL. You're always on the defensive aren't you? Never fallible or accountable. Hey if it works for you, live with it but you buck reality at times.

However, obviously, judging by other people's responses to you on the board, you DO say things that warrant a negative response but you fall back to the position  "I didn’t actually do anything to warrant this kind of response" in some form or another. Also, while the thread began with a simple question, which you say you can't be at fault for presenting, (which is true) some of the comments you made following people's responses moved out that position entirely.

Hmm…..

"If I were saying “Hey, fatty fat fat fat, why don’t you lose weight, you tub of lard? I lost it, you should, too,” then I can understand why they would be mad.

and then…..

Strawberry Riddick…“Hey, look, you can either be mad at how you look or you can fix it. Working out doesn’t take a year out of your life, it’s only 30 minutes a day…20 if you really are constrained. You can wake up 20 minutes earlier, go to bed 20 minutes later, or do it during your lunch break. You can even do it when you’re trying to unwind. Too tired? You’ll always feel better and more energized after a workout, so don’t give me that excuse. So, it comes down to you either make time, or you stop complaining.” 

Wow.. thats tactful!! LOL  I don't know about you, but I haven't really heard anyone on here complain about how they looked, they've expressed the DESIRE to look better, but those are different things. You may not say the words fatty fat, but we all know how you've lost weight in your training by following a similar regimen and rephrasing it here, telling people what they can do to lose weight (we all know what we should we do, give us a little more credit) is akin to the "I lost it, you should too" connotation.  lol In the end, it sounds more like a lecture rather then sage advice.

Another  "But no one stops to think that maybe I’m telling them that because I care about their health." Thanks for you concern, but I, and probably others, didn't ask it for it. There are a lot of people who "care" about our health, but they care so much and remind us so much about it, it becomes annoying after a while. They're called social crusaders.  There comes a point, that comes with greater maturity,(sorry if I keep stressing that, but as someone who was once exactly like you, I know where it came from)  when you learn to just butt out of other people's personal lifestyles unless they are expressely close to you or if they adversely effect you directly.

Well, anyway, those are my last two cents. I'm sure that you'll cling on to the last and find some way, some sliver of justifying your actions that will once again leave you infallibe and faultless. If you do, beware, "It's better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you're a fool, then to open it up and prove them right."

As for you contributing to the board, in some ways (even now) you offer a new perspective and actually help to stimulate discussion of various issues be it art, training, or even threads such as this. Sometimes it's postive, sometimes its negative, but its always interesting.
You've got a great website, interesting art, and you are an inspiration for many people in many ways.  I respect the fact that you're going to serve your country and safeguard not only it, but all those whom we shield from atrocity.

Cheers.

[Vic]

I'm with Dave, Bhudda physique all the way!  Strawberry, your journey of dropping weight to meet (thourghly silly) weight requirements is inspiring. You also contribute to this forum through being articulate and passionate about your views.  As for one posters comment on youth, many of us with more than a few years under the belt (in more ways than one!) know how to take this into account.  All in all, you continue being you, if you choose to change, great, if you don't then that is also great.

[The Muffin man]

The opposite is true in Team America. I don't understand where I went wrong! 😀 It's good that you understand what I'm saying, though.

ALEX: I know you meant it well, I just didn't want others to get the impression that talk like that was a-okay for me 😉
If people become self-conscious just because I ask about what they look like, then maybe they should change their body type if a simple question throws them into a self-hating tizzy.

"To be blunt, its one thing to be femuscular eye-candy, but once you start demonstrating that you got a personality with some real brains to go with the body you suddenly become a threat to their fantasy."
I think it's more the fact that I not only asked people not to treat me like their own personal muscle babe, but I went and made two posts on dA (one to be a less angry-sounding version of the other) talking about how annoying these men are, about how they are unoriginal and have nothing new to offer. So, it's not the brains, it's the lack of desire to put up with their advances and other bs.

KULLI: I agree about the "barmaid build."
I can't speak for others, but when I say "no offense," I mean "Look, this is going to sound mean, but it needs to be said because you need to address and fix this problem. Don't get hung up on being prideful, just take the truth for what it is: the truth." So, if I were to say that you were a whore, then the conversation would have to lend itself to the idea that it's dangerous to you or that you are insulted without knowing why:
you: "I don't know why people make fun of me for being a slut."
me: "No offense, Kulli, but you are kind of a whore. (insert examples)."
OR
me: "I'm worried about your health."
you: "Why?"
me: "No offense, but you're kind of a whore. (insert reasons why it's dangerous)."

I don't know if EVERYONE thinks this way, or if they just use "no offense" as a term which means "I will insult you a lot now."

AVERAGEGUY: Congrats on your weight loss. Why did you lose?
Thank you for your comments about how the military changes someone. I am fully aware that when I get back from Iraq, I will not be the same person, and I'm looking forward to seeing who that person is.
Tact has backfired on me in the past. Many, many times. It's either I have no idea what tact actually is, or that the people I upset were too angry to hear that they weren't perfect…either may be correct. In any case, I decided to give up on being tactful (within reason) because if people are going to get mad when I'm being nice as I can, then no reason to go out of my way to write/talk for a long time only to have them still as pissed as if I just got straight to the point. I've also been told that I talk/write too much, so unless a person wants more explination, I am blunt. I know how to judge a situation better than I did in the past, and so I use more tact when I think it's needed. Some people still get mad, so the only difference between using a lot of tact in the past and using it sparingly now is that I get to save time. :shrug: At least some good came of it.

Yeah, funny how "No Offense" usually prefaces moments of offense 😛

"No offense, but you're half-retarded."
Gee. That's not gonna be offensive 😉

[The_Pimp_NeonBlack]

KULLI: I agree about the "barmaid build."
I can't speak for others, but when I say "no offense," I mean "Look, this is going to sound mean, but it needs to be said because you need to address and fix this problem. Don't get hung up on being prideful, just take the truth for what it is: the truth." So, if I were to say that you were a whore, then the conversation would have to lend itself to the idea that it's dangerous to you or that you are insulted without knowing why:
you: "I don't know why people make fun of me for being a slut."
me: "No offense, Kulli, but you are kind of a whore. (insert examples)."
OR
me: "I'm worried about your health."
you: "Why?"
me: "No offense, but you're kind of a whore. (insert reasons why it's dangerous)."

I don't know if EVERYONE thinks this way, or if they just use "no offense" as a term which means "I will insult you a lot now."

Be mindful of your words, Child, or things shall not bode well for you or others here.

[Anonymous]

It’s hard for me to do so, Pimp. Since my words do not usually bring on so much confusion and/or anger, even on the internet, I must ask for your advice. I don’t want to tiptoe around everyone, but I don’t want to upset anyone, either. What would be a happy medium?

[The_Pimp_NeonBlack]

It’s hard for me to do so, Pimp. Since my words do not usually bring on so much confusion and/or anger, even on the internet, I must ask for your advice. I don’t want to tiptoe around everyone, but I don’t want to upset anyone, either. What would be a happy medium?

The words that you used infered that you thought of Kulli as a 'whore'. Even if that was not your point or objective, that it what they still infered.
Next time when you wish to use an example as the one above, use more genteel words and phrases to get your point across. Going for the more brutal adjective only goes to harm yoursekf and your cause.
Be mindful of such things in the future and all shall bare out as well.
Peace
The Pimp NeonBlack

[Anonymous]

Next time when you wish to use an example as the one above, use more genteel words and phrases to get your point across.

So, instead of saying, "No offense, but you're kind of a whore," one would say, "No offense, Kulli, but I am concerned with the amount of sexual partners you have"?

[Mark Newman]

I have the sense that you are doing your best not to understand what The Pimp Neonblack is telling you.  You asked him what a happy medium would be.  Without being rude or inflammatory, he gave you a specific example of the kind of insulting language we do not want on this site.  Your reply says to me that you do not wish to participate in the "happy medium" of discussion in this community but rather to provoke and antagonize.

I'm not interested in a dialogue with you.  I have other interests here that I enjoy pursuing.  But I won't stand by while you bully others.  So I ask you, politely, to respect our community and our members.  You are welcome to post here, express your opinions and follow your interests, but you are not welcome to hector and belittle us.  I'm sure that intellectually you know the difference.  We will see whether you care to behave.

Mark

Edited: 

I can see from looking back in the thread that I misinterpreted what The Pimp quoted.  Your original quote was illustrating a situation where the word "whore" would be well-justified.  But that has not been the case with many of your other recent comments.

So, taking your post in the best way, your reply may have been right on point.  But my general comment still stands.  I don't want this to be a forum where he or she who insults most loudly or cuttingly crowds out others or drives them away.  I have to deal with that crap day-to-day, but we don't have to here.

[Author]

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