[gracilis]

Second that comment about too many forums.  Why we have both a story archive and seven Stories forums here is … I mean, don't the stories go in the story archive?  So why seven forums?

[gracilis]

I’m still reading, but I’m actually a little surprised to hear you talking about Thursday. When the curtain fell on Wednesday night, after "no one ELSE’S wishes would EVER count ever again," I kinda thought maybe that’s as much of the story as needed to be told, as far as "Pendant Changes" goes anyway. There are obviously a lot of sub-plots spawed here that could turn in to spin-offs.

One reason I’m feeling ambivalent about the future of this story is because I don’t much care for Cindy’s character. She’s comes across as both selfish and stupid, I don’t feel she she’s either a sympathetic character or a compelling villianess, nor, with her attitude, do I find her to be a particularly attractive fantasy. So I’m a little uncertain about where the story is going to go now that she’s taken the spotlight.

If you’re wondering about differences between the between the last few chapters and the beginning of the week, one is that there was a thrill-of-discovery thing happening, and that’s on the decline now. And you’ve already got every woman on the planet struggling to find something in her wardrobe that she won’t destroy when she stretches it over her new figure. Where do you go from there?

While I’m babbling here, I should comment on Marilyn’s email box. It’s interesting. It’s an interesting way of playing with the medium to draw people into the story, not unlike some of the techniques used in The Dionaea House. But then it kind of kept going on and on without advancing the plot in a structured way… so it’s probably fun as a reader-interaction or collaborative fiction tool and a place to play with character sketches, but it’s poorly integrated with the story at this point.

but, as always, thank you for writing!

[gracilis]

Axel, I’m all for a diverse vocabulary, but you’ve really got me wondering. "phrontistery"? I had to look that one up. Google doesn’t offer to define it for me, but it does direct me to a resource for obscure words. Do you keep that site open while you’re writing?

If all this is part of your vocabulary, I won’t argue with it — I don’t want you to dumb down your writing for us less learned folks. If, on the other hand, if you’re going out of your way to insert obscure words, I suggest that you exercise more moderation. Yes, the practice definately lends a distinct character to your writing, but consider what happens to the flow of the work when the reader stumbles over an unfamiliar word.

In any case, I’m very much looking forward to seeing where that violation of the laws of thermodynamics goes.

[gracilis]

I’ve been wondering about Meredith. Having grown up with Chad and now living under the care of Tia, she must be growing in to a powerful figure herself. While I’m not always sure about where the timeline in this story is, I suspect she’s getting old enough to have some adventures away from home.

Thank you, Axel, for this most enjoyable story.

[gracilis]

❗

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