[JimmyDimples]

Hello,

My name is Cala Malika. I am a new student in Baghdad, Iraq. My English teacher, Owen from America, is writing this for me.

I saw him looking at this site. He was embarrassed by it a little. I guess this is why he encourages my friends to play sports. I guess this last week would be a dream come true if he were back in the States. 😉

Me, I am very thankful that teachers from the West came all this way here to make our minds and bodies stronger and help us Iraqis get better lives.

When he saw Celia’s message, he sounded very irritated. I asked what it was about, and he told me.

I do not understand. How can an American girl feel this way? Why would she want to manipulate as well as scare men? I would understand if she were living here. But certainly the American boys and men couldn’t be as bad and cruel as the Iraqis. My friend Adiva would always hide from her brother who would beat her for talking to Westerners in the school. One time two weeks ago, he brought one of his friends to hunt for her, and Owen hid her in his office. He try send men away, they kick him down hit him with sticks. They no find her, but Owen walk pain six day.

Has Celia had to deal with anything like that? If there are nobody but weak enemies, why must she fight on all sides like that.

There was a story from India that Owen taught me in class. There once was a mouse that was afraid of cats. But then it met a magician. It asked him to change him into a cat. So the magician did. The mouse was brave… until it met a dog. So it asked the magician to change it into a dog, too. He did. Then it was not afraid… until it met a horse. So the magician changed it again, into a horse. It was unafraid again… until it saw a tiger. So it had the magician turn it into a tiger. It was totally fearless… but then it met a hunter with a gun.

The mouse/tiger returned to the magician, but this time he changed it back into a mouse. "I am sorry," he said, "but though you have the body of a tiger, you still have the heart of a mouse. I cannot help you."

I soorry. Owen no want write more for me. He too shy, humble. I gentle press hard, but he no want write. So I move him out computer room and close key door and write. I go up, write all story ago.

When women strong and men no strong, Adiva run after brother into class room. She take desk go to kill brother, but Owen go in front of her. He cry. say Adiva, please dont do this. Dont be bad like him. Adiva, you very good girl, your naame mean gentle, pleasant. Adiva, what you doing not you!

Adiva stop. She cry, put down desk. Brother run, no come back.

Owen very brave man . He have body of mouse but heart of tiger and lion.

Celia I know my english no good

s o I w r i t e s l o w l y t o o .

Y o u h a v e b o d y o f t i g e r , l i v e i n t i g e r c o u n t r y A m e r i c a , m a y b e h a v e b e a u t y o f t i g e r. I no k n o w .

B u t y o u h a v e h e a r t a n d h e a d o f m o u s e .

[JimmyDimples]

To: Marilyn Knewsome (marknew742@gmail.com)

From: Jimmy Templeton

Dear Ms. Newsome:

Hi, I’m a new transfer student myself. I was sitting on the outskirts of the class. Sorry I didn’t get to put in my two cents worth, but time ran out. And I think better in print anyway.

I’m very scared for a friend of mine. He’s very smart, pretty nice, and a big political history buff. He’s a great essay writer, and he’ll probably be elected to a high office one day. But he’s a bit of a spaz sometimes, and he got picked on and bullied a lot early on in grade and middle school because of that.

Before all these big changes started, he’d like to pal around with the girls instead of the guys. The jocks liked to call him a queer, and kept giving him swirlies in the boy’s room toilet and pinching his nipples. That made him hide in the girls’ corner all the more. A few girls tease him because he’s shy, mega-sensitive, and I think a bit of a prude, but he’d try to laugh it off.

Now that our muscle’s shrunk away, and the girls are bigger, his former female friends are starting to pick on him more. They’ve gotten a lot unkinder. I think they might have heard that some of the other girls in our session bullied Harold and his buds, and felt like they should too. Peer pressure? I don’t know.

Yesterday, my friend accidentally spilled his Dr Pepper on one girl, Tenny, and before he could even say sorry, she picked him up, dumped him in the recycling trashcan, and rolled him down the hill. The other girls laughed just as hard as she did.

Well, he’s never cut a class in his life. But he didn’t stick around for the rest of the afternoon.

When I went to his house and tried to cheer him up with a pep talk and some of my Dr. Demento CDs, he didn’t want to listen to any of it. He didn’t say anything for a very long time.

The only thing he said, quietly, was "I don’t belong anywhere now."

Well, this morning, just before Spanish class, I saw him with an army surplus duffel bag. And a few other guys from the "outcasts, freaks and geeks" clique (of which I am proud to be a member ;-P) gathered around. He seemed to be whispering some kind of speech. He said he didn’t like how our principal got run ragged by Ms. Dooda, and told everyone that if the school or authorities couldn’t (or wouldn’t, more likely) look after protecting us, we’d better take things in our own hands. He was passing out pepper spray canisters to them and other stuff, and photocopied manuals of something called, "The Poor Man’s James Bond."

When I got alone with him, he said that he appreciated me coming over, and said he’d saved up the best for last.

And he offered me a .38 handgun.

I turned him down. He said, okay, but if Tenny broke my legs or neck, don’t come running to him for sympathy.

Then the bell rang, and he muttered, "Remember Malcom X: By Any Means Necessary." And he left for Chemistry.

I liked your talk today. But it was really demoralizing. I could count the number of non-bully girls in class on one finger. And while Harold and the jocks had acted like… uh… cranial-rectal inverts before, the girls sure weren’t doing any better.

And when that actress girl gave her smarmy little "wishing a pair of deuces into four aces" speech, he’d passed me a note: "Remember what beats four aces. S&W."

I don’t want to slam your gender at all, Ms. Knewsome. But whoever said that women were generally nicer obviously never showed up to a party wearing the same dress as someone else.

I don’t want to get my friend in trouble. But I’m wondering whether or not he’s right.

What I’m scared is that the girls are gonna form a gang, and the bullying’s gonna get worse. Then the next thing we know, someone’s gonna say the wrong thing, and this school is gonna make Columbine look like a pillow fight.

What I’m terrified of, though, is if a lot of girls (and guys) don’t start showing a lot more kindness and a lot less meanness… FAST… that this is gonna happen in schools all over the country.

I want to do the right thing. But I want to stay alive and in one piece! Help!

Jimmy

[JimmyDimples]

Hmmm…. them’s big words.

I’m very curious and interested on what the plant angle’s going to be on this story, but I’m also curious on another thing: the effluent display of one’s extensive multisyllablic vocabulary in narratives involving the heavily augmented female.

(And whut’s up with that thar gobbledygook in these big girl stories, too?)

[JimmyDimples]

There is one question that I’m wondering about:

"Ok so I’m a shrimp give me some reasons I shouldn’t end it all as soon as I get home"

This is one I’d be feeling, because the cruel teen girl seems to be the norm in marknew’s stories.

I know we won’t see this develop in the long term, but I’m wondering if the males will finally decide, "It just ain’t worth it," and break off from any boy-girl interaction altogether. I know we’d mentioned this in another thread.

One thing I’d been thinking is one despondent teen guy has had a very rotten day, after being constantly dumped on, and decides life isn’t worth it. So he grabs a bottle of sleeping pills, goes into his room, locks the door behind him, and decides to gulp the whole thing.

The guy’s mom, or sister, realizing he’d been more miserable than usual, knocks on the door to try to talk and cheer him up. No answer. "Uh, Guy?" No answer. "Guy?" No answer. A quick look across the hall into the bathroom, she notices the pills are missing. "GUY?!!"

That’s when she breaks down the door, sees the empty bottle, and rushes to dial 911. Then she gets a desperate idea, picks up Guy, and starts pressing on the pit of his stomach over and over, simulating a pump, until he finally retches up the pills before he dies.

And as they both cry, she hugs guy close, and reassures him that everything’s going to be okay somehow.

Sorry… I know, it’s marknew’s story. But that’s a little something that was rattling around in my noggin a while.

[JimmyDimples]

Ouch!

You’re gonna have to do something to make up for that one, dude.

[JimmyDimples]

And some continuity errors, lesser dialogue, and typos have been yoinked. That’s that. We’re all sequenced now.

And the thing is, I’ve been getting all sorts of nifty ideas of where to take this thing… Like:

Transfer Student: the Jimmy Dimples Remix

Power Play: Martissa’s Story

And of course the story formerly known as Biotopia: Child’s Play.

And the other continents, as well.

(sigh) So many ideas, so little time.

But my break should kick in after the 20th, so I’m going to have some extra time to write after that.

[JimmyDimples]

Nice picture, coming forwards or backwards.

I’m wondering… do you ever write a text story with your pictures?

Would it be okay if anyone offered one with your permission?

[JimmyDimples]

Very nice, as always, Hunter.

Just one thing to bring us back to On-Topicland… I’m wondering how the girl in that picture is going to handle her new stature and power? What’s the story, and where’s she going to take it?

[JimmyDimples]

And I’ve pulled out the handful of misteaks I made here now. Chapter 6 is all fixed.

When I wrote this the first time, I was drowsy. I took short rations of sleep because I was having a blast writing it. And I was in such a hurry to post it and collect the reader’s kudos, I forgot to do something like, oh, I don’t know… run the spell checker. 😳

All taken care of now…

[JimmyDimples]

Chapter 5’s been deboogered.

Oh, and I was wondering… there wouldn’t happen to be a charitable artist that wouldn’t mind doing some pro-bono artwork on this little story by this humble man-of-means-by-no-means author, would there? 😀

[Author]

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